You know when you’re doing really well in life – maybe you’ve cut out some processed food for a few days, you’ve been doing your morning routine for 2 weeks, and you’ve even made it to those 6:30 AM workout classes you sign yourself up for when you’re feeling super motivated (literally the best feeling when you make it to those) and then all of a sudden you blink and you have NO idea how but you’re back to square one? You started being more lenient with the snooze button, going out to eat sounds like way more fun right now than cooking, you said yes to one too many bday dinners, and bday dinners = accidentally getting blackout, now I can’t get up for my workout class Monday I’m way too fcking tired and pretty sure I’m sick from one of the ten Stilth’s I was huffing on all weekend and holy shit it’s Wednesday, I guess I’ll wait until Monday to start again (*puffs stilth*)
If you can’t tell, I’ve been there…….a few times.
Whatever your problems may be, whether it’s spending too much money, trying to balance eating healthy/working out, etc. It always seems like the moment we start feeling good, getting into a good flow – you know EXACTLY what I mean too – it NEVER sticks. I would genuinely feel like this is exactly how the rest of my life is going to go. I would always tell myself I tried, but that it’s just not me, I’ll never be the kind of person who does a morning routine consistently, I’m just too busy, I can’t say no to this? I HAVE to go to this party and I HAVE to go to this dinner, the list is literally infinite.
What if I told you that the reason nothing has changed is because you keep telling yourself that this is your story. I would constantly tell myself that I couldn’t do things, that I could never live a happy and fulfilled life doing something I absolutely loved because, well, it just won’t happen, it doesn’t happen to people like me.
When we tell ourselves something long enough, we start to believe it. We start to feel embodied by it. We literally become our thoughts and the moment we affirm it by saying it out loud, it’s who (we think) we are. It’s why we always sabotage ourselves the moment things start going well. When we start feeling good, getting in that damn alignment with the universe, we ALWAYS scare our true selves away by rewarding ourselves with our same old bad habits because we still, deep down, believe that this who we are. We keep telling ourselves that this healthy kick “is just a phase”, and if we think that, it’s obviously going to be “just a phase”. We start saying shit like “I just can’t” or “I’ll never be able to wake up early”, “I just don’t even know where to start”, all these hella negative things that do absolutely nothing for us. We fall back into all of our negative habits and feel like we’re back to square one.
What we need to start realizing is that we have control of our mind. The moment you realize you can control exactly what comes up, and what goes in/out is pretty damn powerful. Stop telling yourself this is just a phase? Once you tell yourself it’s a phase, you’re going to start treating it like just a phase. Realize you’re allowed to feel good in your own body, stop getting scared every time you make progress, go into that unknown with open fcking arms and a damn welcome gift.
Here’s a few tips on dealing with that imposter syndrome:
- Figure out your weaknesses
This isn’t supposed to be a list of things you suck at, but you have to be honest with yourself with where you need improvement. Super successful people are honest af with themselves and where they need work on (so I’ve read). They know that perfection isn’t a real thing and embrace the journey of working on themselves. Are you not so good at being consistent? Are you constantly saying you’re tired? Do you tend to focus on the negative things? Be HONEST. Write down the parts in your life where you could use the most work.
Like, the most powerful thing ever and so simple…start saying “I am…” every morning when you wake up. You’ve got to change your mindset by reshaping it, your words DO matter, every single thought you think affects your day whether you are aware of it or not. Once you figure out your weaknesses, re-word them into positive affirmations. Ex: I am consistent, I am full of energy, I am excited for what today brings, etc.
3. Put the blinders on for a little while..
It’s so easy to get caught up in what everyone else is doing on social media. The moment I open my instagram, whether it’s good or bad, I immediately start comparing and comparison is literally the equivalent to unhappiness. We will ALWAYS compare ourselves to other people, we can’t even help it. You can be in the best mood ever with your relationship, career, etc but the moment you see someone else’s relationship, promotion, new outfit you immediately get angry and start the “Why can’t I have that” fiasco. So, lately I’ve muted a lot of people on social media, I always have my notifications turned off and I unfollow any negative vibes (without feeling guilty I may add) trust me…Emily from Grade 11 that you sat next to in Ocean’s class isn’t going to give a shit that you don’t follow her 5 years later.